Together, We Can Change Defeating Patterns and Negative Narratives
I lead individuals and couples in a change process based on Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), the gold-standard modality for creating long-term change in relationships.
Emotion drives all our behaviors, so using cognition or logic to repair an attachment bond will not ultimately be successful. My clients come to see that the root of their relational dysfunction is not the topics they fight about or even their partner's flaws but their unmet need to feel safe, connected, and seen—every human’s basic attachment needs.
In session, I orchestrate conversations about the stuck places that seem unsolvable at home, but instead of engaging in debate, we learn to hear the complex emotions driving our partner’s anger or shut down.
"Underneath all the distress, partners are asking each other: Can I count on you, depend on you? Are you there for me?"
Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight
Why Choose New Story Counseling?
I specialize in relationships and can identify the interpersonal patterns that are keeping you stuck. Instead of treating many types of mental health issues, I committed hundreds of hours to becoming an expert on attachment and relationships. My process is based on my extensive training in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a therapeutic approach that strengthens emotional connection so that you experience your partner as available, responsive, and engaged.
Couples Counseling
In sessions with couples, I track the steps in their relationship's negative cycle, a cycle of disconnect that they've unconsciously fallen into over time. We step away from blame and discover that the vulnerable feelings of rejection and abandonment are fueling the cyclical fights. We see that under surface tensions are attachment cries: Are you there? Do I matter? Change begins when we address these more primal attachment needs instead of getting caught in a he-said-she-said battle.
Individual Counseling
In individual sessions, we explore together how your personal struggles intersect with your relationships and how your default responses may be getting in the way of the love and the life you want. These default responses are related to your attachment style. Instead of feeling defeated by your repeated "failings" or “mistakes,” you’ll see that you make sense in the context of your life’s experience. Your self-concept and expectations of others are shaped by formative moments in your childhood. When you get clear about why you do what you do, you gain insight that can transform your experience and help you move forward.